To determine whether your relationship is abusive, answer the questions below. The more “yes” answers you record, the more likely it is that you’re in an abusive relationship.

Do you:

  • Feel afraid of your partner much of the time?
  • Avoid certain topics out of fear of angering your partner?
  • Feel that you can’t do anything right for your partner?
  • Believe that you deserve to be hurt or mistreated?
  • Wonder if you’re the one who is crazy?
  • Feel emotionally numb or helpless?

Does your partner:

  • Humiliate or yell at you?
  • Criticize you and put you down?
  • Treat you so badly that you’re embarrassed for your friends or family to see how he/she treats you?
  • Ignore or put down your opinions or accomplishments?
  • Blame you for his abusive behavior?
  • See you as property or a sex object rather than as a person?

Does your partner:

  • Have a bad and unpredictable temper?
  • Hurt you, or threaten to hurt or kill you?
  • Threaten to take your children away or harm them?
  • Threaten to commit suicide if you leave?
  • Force you to have sex?
  • Destroy your belongings?

Does your partner:

  • Act excessively jealous and possessive?
  • Control where you go or what you do?
  • Keep you from seeing your friends or family?
  • Limit your access to money, the phone or the car?
  • Constantly check on you?